Parallel parenting in a high-conflict divorce

| Sep 14, 2020 | Child Custody

Parents in the Riverside area who divorced may share equal custody with their child. However, this does not necessarily erase the animosity they may have between one another even after their divorce ended. When bad feelings persist, does this mean co-parenting is impossible? Not necessarily.

Parallel parenting as a means of co-parenting

One type of co-parenting that may work for some couples in this situation is “parallel parenting.” This is a means of co-parenting between parents who are still in a high-conflict situation. Parallel parenting allows parents to disengage from one another while still maintaining a supportive relationship with their child.

How does parallel parenting work?

Through parallel parenting, parents generally reach an agreement on major decisions related to raising their child, but each parent maintains their own rules and routines regarding the child’s daily care during their designated parenting time. Parenting plans will be established, and once in place parents will follow them without having to talk to each other face-to-face.

Any necessary communication regarding the child will be made indirectly, either in emails, texts or even written down in a notebook. This communication should focus solely on the child’s needs, and it should not criticize the child’s other parent or tell that parent how to raise the child.

Parallel parenting can lead to successful co-parenting

Parallel parenting can give parents the means to separate from one another. Oftentimes, with the passage of time, hard feelings can fade, and parents can move into a true collaborative co-parenting relationship. While it may not be an option in all child custody situations, it can serve as a means for both parents to put the child’s needs first and maintain a cordial relationship with one another.

 

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